Stay Away from Indoctrination and Dogma

"As a result, we are no longer to be children, tossed here and there by waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, by craftiness in deceitful scheming;" (Ephesians 4:14 NASB).

Saturday, November 9, 2013

Adultery, Divorce, Children, Reconciliation and Re-Marriage

When I left my wife on October 16, 2008, it was after almost 13 years of living as a prodigal son on self-will run riot, weekly drunkenness, E.G.O., unfaithfulness and a failure to edify my wife and children---as well as lead my home in devotion to the Lord. I was restless, irritable and discontent!

During the separation, I read 1 Corinthians 7 in the Holy Bible, and I was so delusional at the time, that I thought the Holy Scriptures were telling me to divorce my wife...

I filed for divorce on January 29, 2009 and was divorced by September 3, 2009. But life goes on---only after raising children.  

My friends, when you are living on false pride, arrogance, self will run riot and E.G.O. (Edging God Out) for years, it is hard to think straight and you become Spiritually bankrupt as I did.

Today, I know that divorce was mutually justified, because of the "Exception Clause" found in Matthew 19:9.

I recently attended an awesome Relationship Series at my church, but the 4 week series did not cover the subject of divorce---at least the extensive teachings found in the Scriptures. Moreover, the subject of divorce is an uncomfortable subject for some pastors to preach. Nevertheless, I was alright with the Relationship Series, because our church congregation is primarily young people in their twenties and early thirties, who have only been married for a few years. 

In fact, the four week Relationship Series at my church focused on an Unfailing Commitment (UFC) to marriage. 

My Pastor preached an awesome four week marriage series with an emphasis on Nehemiah 4:14.

Nehemiah 4:14 (NIV)
14 After I looked things over, I stood up and said to the nobles, the officials and the rest of the people, “Don’t be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your families, your sons and your daughters, 
your wives and your homes.”

As far as us divorcees, for the last 5 years, the Lord has taken me on an awesome adventure and journey through trials and tribulations to prophesy (proclaim) the Truth of the Holy Scriptures. As a result, I am back to where I was when the Lord first called me at the age of 8 years old (when I first accepted Jesus at Camp Pattersonsville in Upstate, New York), I am on fire for the Lord Jesus Christ! 

I attended Camp Pattersonsville Bible Camp, each summer, for most of my juvenile years, and by age 13 became a C.I.T. (Counselor in Training). By age 16, I became a full time Bible Camp Counselor---responsible for 8-12 campers each summer. 

Each summer, I worked for eight weeks at Camp Pattersonsville---all the way through my first year in college.

In 1985, I attended The King's College, a Christian liberal arts college in Westchester, New York, as a double major in Psychology and Religious Education, and was elected Freshman Class President. I was introduced to cocaine the end of my freshman year and resigned as Class President. By my sophomore year, I was fully addicted to cocaine and drinking. I was eventually kicked out of college, and for the next three and half years, I fell in and out of alcohol and drug detox centers.

In 1987, I was introduced to 12-Step recovery, and it took another three years for me to commit to staying sober. October 1990, I got clean and started working the God-centered 12 Steps of AA/NA with a sponsor and went to meetings weekly. 

By 1995, I gained 5 years sober in the 12-Step fellowship, and married my girlfriend within 8 months of dating her. The day we married, she moved out of her parents house---with her son from her first marriage---and we began a new life together. 

A little over 6 years sober, I got cocky, my E.G.O. came back and I stopped going to meetings...I became depressed and decided to start drinking again. Today, I am almost 3 years sober, and I know there is no excuse to drink and drug... 

I keep vigilant to stay sober through prayer, daily devotions and praise, going to AA meetings several times a week, working the 12 Steps with a sponsor and service work to help others. 

I raised my stepson since he was 2 1/2 years old. My ex-wife and I have three daughters together, who are now 13, 15 and 16 years of age, and my stepson is now age 20. 

Now that I have prefaced this writing with my personal testimony, I am going to simply try to give you the teachings from the Holy Scriptures that convicted my heart back in 2009. These Scriptures had me escape to my cabin in the Catskills to cry my eyes out in repentance for a week in March 2009.

The Lord has used these past 5 years to renew my strength (Isaiah 40:31) and free me from the bondage of self and others---especially false Christian religions that suppress the Truth.

Here are the Holy Scriptures on Divorce, Adultery, Children, Reconciliation and Re-Marriage---for you to read, pray on, and allow the Holy Spirit to convict your heart or not.

Matthew 19:3-12 (NLT)

3 Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason?”

4 “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’[a]” 5 And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’[b] 6 Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”

7 “Then why did Moses say in the law that a man could give his wife a written notice of divorce and send her away?”[c] they asked.

8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted divorce only as a concession to your hard hearts, but it was not what God had originally intended. 9 And I tell you this, whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery—unless his wife has been unfaithful.[d]”

10 Jesus’ disciples then said to him, “If this is the case, it is better not to marry!”

11 “Not everyone can accept this statement,” Jesus said. “Only those whom God helps. 12 Some are born as eunuchs, some have been made eunuchs by others, and some choose not to marry[e] for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven. Let anyone accept this who can.”

a. 19:4 Gen 1:27; 5:2.
b. 19:5 Gen 2:24.
c. 19:7 See Deut 24:1.
d. 19:9 Some manuscripts add And anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. Compare Matt 5:32.
e. 19:12 Greek and some make themselves eunuchs.

Cross Reference:
Matthew 5:32; Mark 10:10-12; and Luke 16:18

We are not called upon to treat divorce according to Old Testament Mosaic Law (Deuteronomy 24:1-4). 

Jesus made clear that the above Mosaic Law allowance of divorce became extinct and could not be practiced among His disciples, except in the case of sexual immorality.

Matthew 5:27-32 (NIV)



27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’[a] 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.


31 “It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’[b] 32 But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

a. Matthew 5:27 Exodus 20:14

b. Matthew 5:31 Deut. 24:1

It is very widely maintained in the Christian church that there should be no divorce for any cause whatever. This position is in plain contradiction to Christ's teaching in Matthew 15 and Matthew 19. Luke and Mark do not record the "Exception Clause" for allowing divorce on the grounds of sexual immorality. But neither Luke nor Mark were personal disciples of the Lord. They wrote second hand. Matthew was a personal disciple of Christ and has twice recorded the exception. 

Of course all Scripture is inspired by God (2 Timothy 3:16-17), but Jesus Christ is the Living Word of God (John 1:1; John 1:14; Revelation 19:13), and is the ultimate authority on divorce. It has been thought that Paul had the subject in hand, but as you will read in the Holy Scriptures found in 1 Corinthians 7, the Apostle Paul, referenced what commands he received from the Lord, and what words were only his strong suggestions.

Therefore, we must consider that Matthew 19 is the New Testament Scriptural doctrine on divorce.


1 Corinthians 7:10-15 (NIV)

10 "To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife."

12 "To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. 13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy."

15 "But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace."

Paul is the only other New Testament author besides Christ who has taught on divorce. But a careful examination of Paul's writing will disclose the fact that he has nowhere discussed the question--for what cause a man might put away his wife, or a woman her husband, with liberty to marry another person

The society that allows by its statutes divorce for any other cause than "sexual immorality" (adultery, homosexuality and infidelity) breaks the "Exception Clause" of Jesus Christ.

Paul does not discuss the question for what cause a marriage might be terminated with a divorce decree, but rather the question of manners and morals in the relationship between virgins and unmarried men, married couples, divorcees and widows. For more information, read 1 Corinthians 7:32-38. 

Paul has not contradicted Christ in any respectPaul has Not said in the verse of 1 Corinthians 7:15, or anywhere else that a Christian partner deserted by an unbeliever may be married to someone else. Therefore, Jesus' "Exception Clause," of sexual immorality is the only grounds for divorce and remarriage.

The Holy Scriptures are indeed convicting for me. The Lord had me in a "holding pattern." As much as I have spent the last 5 years evangelizing and preaching the Truth of the Holy Bible that is not normally taught in church...I was still restless, irritable and discontent as far as my dating life---until recently

Before I can consider casual dating and slowly getting to know a new female friend, I had to at least write the Truth on the Blog, so that I keep focused on what the Lord has called me to do.... 

The reason is that I am called first to serve the Lord as an evangelist for the sake of the Kingdom of Christ---by reaching the lost and those mentally, emotionally and spiritually confused.

If you are a Christian and want to live holy, devotion to Christ and following God's Word must be the number One priority in your life. Christ calls us to deny ourselves, and take up our cross and follow Him (Matthew 16:24; cf: Luke 9:23). 

We are to imitate Christ and lead others to Jesus, so that people may find the gift of Salvation, and freedom from spiritual, mental and emotional bondage.

1 Corinthians 7:16 (NIV)

16 "How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?"

I will close this writing by saying that if there was unfaithfulness and sexual immorality in your marriage, only the Lord can make clear to you if dating (with an ultimate goal of re-marriage), or reconciliation with your former spouse, is in His will and timing. Consider this final Holy Scripture...

1 Corinthians 7:8-9 (NLT)
8 So I say to those who aren’t married and to widows—it’s better to stay unmarried, just as I am. 9 But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry.
It’s better to marry than to burn with lust.

1 Corinthians 7:39-40 (NLT)
39 A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but only if he loves the Lord. 40 But in my opinion it would be better for her to stay single, and I think I am giving you counsel from God’s Spirit when I say this.

If you have not formally accepted Jesus Christ, please accept the Gift of Salvation by saying this short prayer
"Dear Jesus, I repent of my sins and the original sin of mankind, please come into my heart and change me to trust in you and build my personal relationship with you by studying your word and applying it to my life to the best of my ability. Thank you for dying on the cross for the remission of sin. Thank you for conquering death with your resurrection. I accept you Jesus as my Lord and Savior, please lead me and guide me. Amen!"

If you have said that short prayer, I welcome you to the True Body of Christ (not a religion or denomination). Please get into a Bible-based church, where the Word of God is taught unadulterated and reject the Tradition(s) of men. 

Pray, study (2 Timothy 2:15) and meditate upon God's Word, and trust that the Holy Spirit will guide you (John 14:16-24).

Godspeed, love and Truth,

Brother Johnson, XU

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